If you are thinking about how to date a stripper, you may be wondering if this is a good idea or not. You may also wonder if anyone can give you some good advice on to how to approach the person whom you wish to date. In all honesty, it would be best if you were to prepare in advance for the likelihood that not only will most people from whom you request advice not have any positive input, they will probably try to convince you that you should be looking elsewhere for prospective dates!

You need to know how to date a stripper. You have already made up your mind, and you do not wish for other people’s opinions to sway you from your decision. This in itself may be considered to be a point in your favor! You should then be ready to approach this person with your interest and intent.

Actually, it is more likely that you are almost ready. It will be in both your own best interests and hers as well if you are sure of your intentions. If you are thinking about a serious relationship with a stripper, you will probably end up disappointed. On the other hand, if you believe that her job automatically means that she is available to anyone and for anything, there will be nothing unique about you– you will be no different from others that she deals with on a daily basis.

How to date a stripper is not nearly as important as why. If you have actually developed an interest in this person, and wish to get to know her better, this fact alone will set you apart from the majority. If you are willing to put some careful thought into it so that your intentions are reflected in the way you approach her, you may be pleasantly surprised by the results. You will see that how to date a stripper is really no different from dating anyone else.

A person’s line of work usually does not sum up who and what the individual person is inside. This is as true with a stripper as with any other person. The ongoing problem is that a person who is in this for a living rarely encounters men who are aware of this fact. If you are aware of it, you will have a much better chance of success.

You may or may not have interests in common. You may or may not have compatible personalities. If your actual interest is to get to know this person and find these things out for yourself, being clear, upfront, and honest in your approach will be a great benefit. You could very well be the first one who has seen her as a real person in a very long time. This degree of mutual respect and honesty can very well be the only keys that you will need to reach someone who may be a very special person once she has been given the chance to show it.

“How to Effortlessly Make Your Ex-Girlfriend Want to Come Back to You”

I met and dated my first stripper at the age of 46. So that should give you hope. And now at the age of 50 I am still going strong with my current dancer girlfriend. Over the last five years I’ve dated and had relationships with five strippers. And by relationship I mean we dated for months or years. And I could have dated and had sex with many more if I had been willing to date more than one woman at a time.

All this and I’m a pretty average guy. Tall, and in good shape, but by no means a stud. I have a decent condo and drive an OK vehicle. No Porsche, no Ferrari, no mansion in the hills. I make a decent living but not anywhere close to rich. I’m just a guy, so I know it can be done. If I can do it, you can do it.

My First Stripper
I met Amber, my first stripper girlfriend, online while I was working in Europe. I was homesick and posted an ad on a dating website. She was from my hometown and we started writing back and forth. It was a few weeks before she confessed to being a stripper and sent me a few interesting pictures. She was worried that I would think badly of her. I didn’t make a big deal out of it, what did I care, I was 1500 miles away! She was interesting, smart and told the best dirty jokes so we kept writing and never talked about her job in correspondence after that.

Well, eventually I came back home and we decided to meet. I sort of figured that this would be the end of it, but she actually liked me and we ended up dating for over a year. All good things come to an end, and so did my relationship with Amber. During the time we dated I rarely went into the club where she worked. But, after we broke up and she moved to another city, I started to frequent that club more often. I knew one or two people there, it was something to do, and it was a good way to avoid having to get back into the dating scene.

Enough with Dating
The club became my regular Friday night hangout, and after a few months I became one of the gang. Even though I rarely spent money on dances, a young girl named Julie attached herself to me. First we started having breakfast after work, then saw a movie, and eventually started dating. She was a blast! Not the best looking girl in the club, but not the worst, lots of fun, easy to please, very grateful for the attention, great in the sack, and only 26. After about six months, our relationship ran its course and we parted as friends. But, since she still worked at the the club, I had to find a new place to hang out.

I began to live the life I had only dreamed of…
So I picked another topless club, much closer to where I live, and started hanging out there. After a while a 29 year-old blonde named Misha claimed me as hers and one thing led to another. About this time a close male friend of mine from Seattle came into town for a two-week visit. We spent some time at the club and he wrote me later that he had the time of his life and wanted to know how I did it. To tell the truth, I really had not given it much thought. I didn’t really start out with the intent to date a dancer, it just sort of happened. But by now it had happened three times. So over the next month or two I thought about it, talked with my girlfriend about how we got together, and began to email hints and ideas to my friend.

Other friends started asking me the same thing and I sent them the emails too. So with some input from them, other girls, and a few online friends, the whole thing grew into a book. Again, I didn’t start out to write a book about dating topless dancers. But when I saw this method work over and over again and kept getting questions about it, I thought… why not!

So here you go… this is what I did, this is what my friends did, and somehow we stumbled through it and made it work. We are a pretty normal bunch, not rocket scientists (well OK, one guy did work for NASA a bit) and certainly not “playas.” If we can do it, so can you.

Get ready for a wild ride!

How to Date a Stripper
So, you want to date a stripper? Don’t feel like some kind of pervert, almost every guy I know has either dated one, or fantasized about dating one. If for no other reason that to cross it off the, “things I must do before I die,” list. Besides, what’s not to like?

Strippers and topless dancers are easy to meet, all you have to do is say hello and extend your hand. A stripper in a club will never reject you.
Strippers are open about sex.
Strippers have great bodies.
Strippers are not shy.
So who can blame you? I’m right there with you This is all based on my experiences dating strippers and topless dancers that I have met in the club and dated by following the simple techniques that anyone can learn.

And if you happen to be curious, yes, over the last few years I have read the books out there about dating dancers and in most places I completely, 100%, disagree with the advice given. Do what those books say and you will never see a girl outside the club and they will look at you as just another loser customer.

You Should Hear What They Say About Customers
I’ve been around them for long enough now to hear how they talk about their customers, and it’s not nice. It’s not always mean, but in the last five years of being around strippers I was dating, and their dancer friends, I have never heard any of them say anything even remotely close to, “Wow, that customer I had last night was such a great guy, I wish he would ask me out.” Not even close. The killer word there is “customer.” As long as the girls see you as just another loser customer, you will never get anywhere. I don’t care how many drinks you buy, or if you send flowers to the club, or spend thousands in the VIP room. You will still be a customer. You are a valued source of income. If you try and see her outside the club, she will politely say no. If you push it, she will probably get a restraining order. Trust me, she knows how. She’s had to do it before.

“Aw baby, that’s sweet, but I don’ go out with customers. I could lose my job.” Go ahead and ask her out and you will hear something like that. Maybe even word-for-word. They learn it quickly and spit it out without really even considering your offer. And the more you spend, the more impossible it becomes for her to see you. She hates feeling obligated, cheap, and trashy. Bought and paid for.

Here’s the Secret to Dating Success with Strippers
The trick is not to be a customer, but to be an insider. While they will never say, “I hope that customer comes back in and asks me out,” I have often watched them make subtle mental shift and say, “Wow, I hope that friend of Tina’s (the bartender) comes back this week. Maybe we can go out to breakfast.” That’s what I taught my friends to do and can teach you to do as well. Unless you are very rich or very good-looking, it’s the only way.

If you think you ARE that good looking, give it a test. Go to a club and pick out a girl. Talk to her, laugh, charm her, buy her a drink, and one dance. Then leave. If she lets you leave without her phone number it’s a bad sign. If you go back a second time without her either giving you her number, or taking you back to the VIP area for free, then you are not good-looking enough. Not many men are.

This does not mean that you are not good looking enough for her to go out with, just that you are not good looking enough to get her on sheer looks alone. If she gets to know, trust, and like you, then maybe, but only if you are in on the joke as an insider.

Don’t Take My Word for it – Hear it Straight from Her

You have to get to be seen as an insider; someone who is in on the scam, a friend of the club. And you don’t have to take my word for it. There is a stripper name Tara that has an ongoing diary on Yahoo.

This is her take on how to date a stripper:

I’m going to show you how to become an insider like the ones she describes without having to actually work at a club. Now if you are so inclined and want to work at a strip club, well knock yourself out. You won’t need the rest of this article. But jobs for guys are limited at a club. Sure they need bouncers, but that’s probably not you. Most don’t use male bartenders, so that usually leaves only bar backs, parking lot guys, cooks, and dishwashers. Nah, doesn’t sound like fun to me either.

10 Reasons a Stripper WILL Want to Date You

Believe it or not, if you present yourself in the right way, there’s a good chance that you will get a dancer to go out with you. Here’s why:

No matter what she says, every dancer eventually (or even regularly) goes out with someone she met at the club.
As an insider, it is easy for her to trust you and to feel comfortable seeing you outside the club.
You already know all about her “secret life” and are OK with it. This is huge.
She has seen you often enough in a bar full of women to know how you treat other people and to know you are not a drunk or an ass.
The bartenders and bouncers like you so you must be OK.
You are clean, well groomed, well dressed, and obviously have your act together.
She has seen you with the other girls and has seen you be fun and friendly without coming on to them. She can trust you around her other hot stripper friends.
It’s not all about sex with you, but you obviously like sex.
You are not like all the other losers that try and date her. You have a life. You have a future.
And – no matter how tough she appears – she still is just a girl looking for a boy, she still believes in the dream of romance and Mr. Right who will come along and make her life easier.

Why Strippers Date the Men they Do
It all comes down to a very simple statement and idea – You have to become the kind of man she wants to go out with. It’s that simple. She is used to getting her way, and has a nice fantasy in her head about the kind of man she wants to date. You just have to become some version of that guy. She has a long list of things she knows she wants, but she also has an unconscious list of things she wants that she is not even aware of and could probably not verbalize. It’s the only way to explain the difference between what she says she wants and what she actually winds up with.

I’ve known quite a few strippers and very, very few actually date the kind of guy the say they are looking for. So why do they go out with these guys who are obviously Mr. Not-Even-Close-To-Right?

I’ve had this exact conversation with a very close dancer friend. She has a great list things she wants in a guy: handsome, smart, businessman, funny, treats her well, etc. But when she gave me that list, she was actively dating a sales rep from a liquor company who had the club as an account. He was none of the things on the list. Well, he was sort of good looking, or at least had been about 10 years ago. But he was around a couple of times a week and knew everyone at the club. Over a period of time they became friends and one thing eventually led to another. See, the most important thing was that he was an insider. He understood her business, knew what he was getting into, and was probably not going to give her a hard time about it. So because he was an insider, the rest of the list went out the window.

The Conversation She Wants to Avoid at All Costs
For most girls at the club, the worst part of dating is telling the new boyfriend that she strips. She hates how that makes her feel. She has had this conversation before and she knows how it goes – badly. So when a decent guy comes along that already knows she strips and doesn’t seem to care, then he scores a lot of subconscious points. She knows at least she won’t have to have that conversation. This gives you a huge, unfair advantage!

Becoming an Insider
First, let me make this clear. You can do this. It’s not as hard as it sounds but it’s not going to happen over night. You may currently feel pretty intimidated by the atmosphere and girls at a club, but if with some planning, in a little bit of time, you won’t even notice the naked women. Well that might be an exaggeration, but it certainly will be no big deal.

So, how do you become an insider? It’s a matter of:

Knowing how the business works
Knowing the right people
Knowing how to act
Just think about your own business. Whatever you do for a living, you are an insider in that world. You know what is going on with the business, how it works, what the issues are, and how to speak the lingo. You could have a conversation with another insider and an outsider would probably miss half of it because they would have no context for the new words, phrases, or names. It’s the same for a strip club. Yes, no two clubs are exactly the same just as no two banks or shipping companies are the same. But they do have a lot in common, and the differences are what makes for interesting conversation when two insiders meet.

That’s the secret! Be an Insider.
I can show you how to be an insider just like I did for my friends. We emailed back and forth for so long that when I looked back, it was all written down. I spent a few days putting it together then ran it past a few girls I know. They hated the first draft. So I re-wrote and re-wrote till I found a happy medium between what I like and what they liked. It’s as close to being objective as I can possibly make it. It’s actually painful for some of the girls to read because they see themselves a little too clearly! But not one of them said it would not work. They had seen it, a lived it, many times.

Let’s Be Clear
I’m not in any way advocating scamming these girls!Please don’t confuse this book with some of the other stuff that’s out there. My ebook is new material, just published. This advice will get you dates with strippers without using false, manipulative, and let’s face it, bullshit tactics that are the subject of the other books.

No scams or gimmicks like handwriting analysis, magic tricks, or palm reading.
I’m not talking about Hypnosis. What a crock.
I’m not talking about NLP (Nero-Linguistic Programming). “What’s it like when you … become incredibly turned on?” Come on, who can say that stuff with a straight face.
No cons or pretending to be a photographer, costume salesman, or movie producer.
Just an easy-to-follow, straightforward process that let’s you be yourself. It puts you in a position and mind set to be trusted and viewed as “high-status dating material” by these girls. Once this happens, they will pursue you.

Here’s What You Will Learn
First, I’ll give you a few easy things to do to get a strong ally in the club. To get inside, you have to be friends with someone already on the inside. I’ll tell you who to talk to and exactly how to make friends with them. (page 30)

I will tell you of how strip clubs work. The real inside scoop. This will allow you to talk about, and ask questions about, things that clearly show that you are not an easy mark, you know how the game is played.(page 24)

I’ll tell you exactly what to do when you enter the club and where to sit so you will be with the other insiders. You really don’t want to be with the “regulars.” (page 26)

You will have to get your act together before even going into a club. I’ll tell you what to do. (page 41)

All clubs are not created equal. I’ll show you how to pick a club that will have the most receptive girls and the most helpful staff, and tell you how to spot the ones to avoid.(page 45)

You will get six surprising questions to ask when getting to know a dancer. Good conversation starters that tell her you are an insider. I’ll also tell you about the “heavy seven” questions to avoid at all costs or you will look like a dope. (page 56)

How do you find out which girls are interested in you? It’s easy, I’ll show you. (page 59)

I’ll describe in detail how to spot the one type of girl working in the club that, if approached correctly, will be the easiest to date. And it has nothing to do with amateur night. This type of girl needs to meet someone just like you, and she might be the best looking girl there! (page 61)

I’ll share with you 3 dynamite ways to get a girl that is interested to actually ask you out.(page 65)

Once she is interested, I’ll show you how to be her hero and close the deal. I’ll give you three ways that are easy, but she rarely sees from other guys. (page 69)

On top of all that I’ll toss in 3 bonus chapters – right in the ebook. You will also get A) my own insider tips that I learned the hard way, B) quotes from the girls about how they actually DO date club patrons, and C) information pulled straight from dancer training information about how to get more get money out of you. it’s actually find of fun when you see the scams coming from a mile away. (page 100)
“How to Date a Stunning Stripper” is the result a lot of thinking and talking to the girls trying to find the common thread among all the different guys that my stripper friends were dating or married to. Rich guys, broke guys, exciting loud types, dull quiet types, some seemed to be average guys like me. What was the common thread?

It came to me one morning about 4 A.M. one morning when I was sitting in the club after closing having a drink and having a conversation with the night manager and one of the floor managers. A thought suddenly occurred to me, “this is a damn odd situation for me to be in.” Somehow, I had crossed the invisible line between “customer” and “insider.” I was not sure when it had happened, but after thinking about it a while, it all made perfect sense to me. And it will to you too.

This is cool new information that I really want everyone interested in dating a stripper to have. There is nothing else like this out there, I’ve read them all.

Do you pay for a date or do you go dutch? Many guys aren’t sure what the best thing to do is. I’m going to assume in this article that you’re not so cheap that the money itself is a consideration and just getting laid is.

In general, yes, you should pay. If you don’t, girls will think you are cheap or a dick. So if you are out on a dinner date or something similar to that with a girl, you should offer to pay.

However, don’t put yourself in a situation where you have to pay A LOT for the girl. For example, don’t take a girl out for an elegent 5 course dinner before you have even slept with her. Not only are you shelling out a lot of dough, she will actually respect you less. In her mind, she’s thinking ‘why is he trying to hard to get me…he must not be good enough for me.’ And yes, in this situation, you still need to pay. You still screwed yourself over by treating her too well before she sleeps with you, but insisting on going dutch at that point pretty much torpedoes whatever chances you have left with the girl.

So, when dating girls, remember two things:

1. Don’t spend too much money on them before they sleep with you. Otherwise they wont’ respect you.

2. You still need to pay for any date you go on with them though. So don’t go on any expensive dates before you stick it in her.

Everyone likes a top ten list right. Here’s the top ten ones guys make when trying to date a stripper:

10: Waiting for the stripper to come talk to you. When a stripper approaches you, she gets herself in ’stripper’ mode instead of ‘girl’ mode. Also, by approaching a stripper yourself, it shows confidence.

9: Touching a stripper prematurely. Douchebags and skeezy old guys touch these girls all day. Keep your hands to yourself at first so you don’t get categorized with those guys.

8: Going on a Friday or Saturday night. That’s when the strip club is the most busy and they have the least time for you.

7: Asking ‘what’s your real name’ immediately. It’s good to not refer to them by their stripper name, but you don’t want to force the issue. It’s not a big deal at first.

6. Letting them direct the conversation. If they start talking toy ou, they’ll immediately get into stripper mode and associate you as just another customer.

5. Asking common questions like ‘where are you from?’ Try to take the conversation on a different level. Be funny and creative.

4. Giving up on the hottest strippers. The type of strippers that are impossible to date have nothing to do with looks. You want to avoid incompetent girls or druggies, but looks generally has nothing to do with this.

3. Waiting a few days to contact a stripper after getting a phone number. If you get a number, contact her the next day. You might as well find out if she is into you and is competent enough to be able to see you. Why waste time?

2. Going with a bunch of guys. It’s really tough to pick up a stripper if you’re with a lot of your friends. It puts you more into ‘customer’ status and her into ’stripper’ mode and it also just creates a bunch of logistical issues. Avoid the frat party/bachelor party look.

1. Buying dances. The fastest way to be a ‘customer’ and not a ‘lover’ is to buy dances

Why we should fuck strippers

The MOST important thing you have to do is separate yourself from the other guys. You can’t be your average chump that goes in there, wallet ready to get lap dances.

To begin with, you need to ‘neg’ the stripper, meaning basically flirt with her by teasing her. You MUST act like you think you are good enough for the stripper to want to date outside the strip club. Basically, you shouldn’t want to pay her to go out on a date with you. IF anything, she should pay you to go out on a date with her. You need to act like you can get girls like her all the time, so it’s a matter of if she’s good enough for you.

By ‘negging’ her, you send this message in a playful matter. For example, let’s say a stripper has some like schoolgirl outfit on. When you approach her (again, better to approach her than she approach you because it shows confidence), you should say something like “School girl outfit huh? That’s real original.”

Stripper: Haha, I know a lot of girls wear it, but I think it’s cool.

You: Yeah, I mean, it’s ok in all in theory, it’s just that most of the girls that wear it are kinda nuts. Last girl I talked to wearing a schoolgirl outfit was some 40 year-old that believed she had a 12 year-old girl’s spirit trapped in her. You’re not like nuts like that are you?

As you can see, you are starting a conversation with her that’s funny, but at the same time, making it seem like she is the one that needs to validate herself to you.

The WORST thing to do is to go to a stripper and talk about how pretty she is, how you could never be able to date a girl like her, how you’ll give her money just to go shopping with you, etc. Strippers HATE that. They don’t respect those sorts of guys. They see it all the time and it grosses them out.

Strippers in general love a little good-natured abuse. Not like crazy ex-boyfriend domestic violence abuse (though sadly that does happen a lot), more along the lines of negging and having her hair-pulled/ass slapped during sex type abuse.

Anyways, I digress. After talking to the stripper, negging her and stuff, you’ll at some point need to get the stripper’s number. This in of itself is not that hard. The issue though is that strippers are extremely flaky. Getting them to answer the phone, no less meet you somewhere later is incredibly difficult feat to accomplish. It is a generally more practical route to go somewhere after she gets off work.

It helps a lot if you’re a semi-regular at the strip club. If she gets to know you, she’lll be more comfortable leaving with you. You’ll also have multiple opportunities to neg her and flirt with her.

Being a semi-regular does not need to be expensive. The key is to not pay for lap dances. Tip a girl on stage- sure. In fact, tip them beter than average, like a $5-$10 instead of a few singles. But if you start getting lap dances from her, not only are you paying way too much for pretty pathetic entertainment, she’ll start viewing you as a customer more than as a potential date.

Now, buying a drink for the stripper is perfectly good and is a good way to get some flirting time in. So drinks yes, lap dances no.

Dating strippers involves a lot of variance. Once you get good at it, you’ll realize that it’s more of a matter of how flaky they are than how good your game is. Just act confident, cocky, funny, have a good time, and don’t spend too much money

First of all, you’ve got to have a destination in mind before you embark on this venture. What do you want from the Stripper? A few fun evenings out on the town with a little hottie on your arm? Sex? Free passes to the Titty Bar where you met her? Everlasting true love? Handjob? Look — walking into this without a goal is certain means for failure, because she operates on her own terms and if you let her manipulate you and lead the show, you’re sunk. She meets 50 guys a night who are potential dates, so she’s just playing the odds with you. She’s thinking she just might meet someone who can handle her, but no one can. Trust me. No one can handle her. You’ll never change her or pull her out of Stripperville. Remember that and keep your eyes on the prize.

Several points to consider:

1. You’re not Special.

You’re one of 18 guys she’s juggling right now, and one of a hundred who witness her naked glory every night. It’s her job to make guys feel like they’re the only one she’s interested in. She gets paid handsomely for that skill. That sultry stare she’s giving you across the dinner table with those piercing green eyes is the same look that forces 75 men-a-night to fumble for their wallets and jam fistfuls of green into her G-string even though they’re six months behind on child support.

2. She makes more money than you. Get used to it.

Keep in mind that she pulls down more than most corporate attorneys (who also represent a large portion of her clientele). She’s ripping 2-5K a week tax-free, and you shouldn’t expect her to pay for anything. It’s not in her nature. Guys fawn all over her every single night and offer her stacks of crisp Benjamins in an effort to get their knobs slobbered on in the parking lot behind the club (something she’ll claim she’s never done, but the other girls at the club have — right — she’s done it at least once).

3. If you get emotionally involved with this girl, you’re in for a hurricane of pain.

Your future with this chick: broken dates, shattered windows, holes punched in doors, a slew of ex-boyfriends and husbands, a thousand “friends” calling all the time, an encyclopedia of restraining orders she has out on said exes and a couple customers who stalked her for six months. Her apartment is littered with soggy G-strings and cheap 8-inch heeled shoes, along with empty tubes of body glitter, mascara, prescription drugs, zit cream, Aqua Net and Polaroid pictures of her and her “friends” engaged in some drinking and dancing on St. Patrick’s Day last year. The Polaroid pictures of her and her stripper friends getting nasty for the entire bar are still circulating around town because one of the guys she dated last month stole them out of her nightstand when he sensed the end was near and he wasn’t going to be getting any more Cinnamon Love.

3. She has more guy friends than you had all throughout high school and college, collectively.

Sometimes they’ll just drop in when you two are hanging out and you’re thinking it might get romantic. The guy friend will ask her — right in front of you — if she wants to go to Happy Hour at the Knick Knack Paddy Whack Lounge and she’ll look at you with bright eyes and say, “Yeah — let’s go to Happy Hour with Tim here — it’ll be fun!” And you, still gripping on to that glimmer of hope for some pussy, will say yes and you’ll spend the next three hours in a simmering rage while you quaff watered-down Bud Light drafts, because she’s the most popular girl in the bar and every person with a penis in there is looking to hop on the Stripper Wagon that is blazing through Stripperville at a very unsafe speed.

All of those “guy friends” started out just like you, chief. They saw the Promised Titty Land and thought they could get there, too. Once they tired of the bullshit and drama, or she found someone else, they were relegated to “friends.” They could’ve bought a fucking sailboat with all the money they blew on young Cinnamon, and now they hang on to some last vestige of hope, thinking that she may just get drunk enough some night and let them put their spit on the slit. You guys could all get together and swap the exact same stories about wasted nights, full-blown disappointment, and confused, desperate whack-off sessions when you all found out that dating a stripper is no different than trying to debate Nietzsche with a Dalmation.

4. Her life is a flurry of activity selected at random.

This stimulates her sub-par self-esteem. At 10am she will be rocketing down the freeway at 130mph on the back of some guy’s crotch rocket. By 1pm she’s already at some different guy’s house, swimming naked in the pool with him and his Great Dane named Robo. By 5pm she’s doing “X” at some other guy’s house, and from there she goes home for the five-minute shower and gets ready for work.

5. She’ll blow you off for three dates in a row.

When you keep calling, she knows she has you. That Saturday night dinner and special room you’ve secured at the fucking Ritz will be vaporized after she tells you she’s going to Mexico with some of her “friends.” Her whimsical trip to Mexico will forever after be known as Cabo Wabo Orgy 2002, and you’ll likely come across some digital pix of her fellating two guys on the beach in Cabo while you’re scanning some amateur porn site on the Net.

It’s a crazy affair, for sure, but just remember these do’s and don’ts and you’ll be fine:

DON’T ever call her and not announce your name. Her phone rings more than all of the lines at the New York Times combined. Don’t put her in the precarious position of trying to guess your name. “Is it Steve? Rick? Mike? Dave? Javier? Justin? Michael? Chris? Matt? Juan? Adam? Alex? Roberto? Ed? Brian? Eugene? Tim?” She’ll make it quite clear that she has many suitors, which excites her to no end, and puts you in a bottle of bourbon all alone by 9pm that night. Try to sound upbeat: “Hi Cinnamon, this is Greg, I was just walking through Tiffany’s, looking at a $900 sterling-silver ashtray and thought of you.” (She smokes. They all smoke. She’d gush over an ashtray from Tiffany’s. Don’t buy it, though. Make her think you would’ve bought it for her, if only there was a rose engraved on it.)

DON’T ask her about her fucking tattoos unless you want to look like one of her customers.

DON’T go see her at her job unless it’s absolutely necessary. A necessity would be getting her condo key so you can go feed her cat. If you get to that point, FYI, you’re now one of her “friends,” and you can wrap up the sexual fantasies you have of her by beating off right on her pillow after you throw the cat some Meow Mix.

DON’T try to keep up with her. Don’t skip work to spend the day with her. She works nights and you work days. Keep your job. Her days are spent at tanning booths, Frederick’s of Hollywood and chic outdoor cafés where her and her stripper “friends” eat poached salmon salads with dressing on the side.

DO carry lots of hundreds in a money clip. Make sure she sees you strip off the bills when the dinner check comes. Or better yet, whip out the Corporate Amex and toss it on the table like you’re folding a bad poker hand. Clasp your hands behind your head and lean back into your chair after you make the Amex toss, as if to say, “See that? Unlimited credit, baby.”

DO kiss her on the cheek when she shows up at your place for the nice dinner you’re going to cook her, and knock her fishnets off with your ability to handle the cuisine and wine. At some early point in the evening though, you’re going to have to find her cell phone in her purse and steal the battery out of it, because that thing will ring incessantly and she will eventually find something or someone better to do. Pull the battery or she’s going to get some call at midnight, when you’ve got the Miles Davis playing lightly in the background, and the candles illuminating the room in a soft glow and you think you’re about to “storm the beach.” This call will undoubtedly be from one of her “friends” who is going to an after-hours party at some country bar and all of the sudden she’ll squeal with delight and jot down the address on her hand and say to you, “Let’s go Two-Stepping at the Country Bunker with John and Kevin!”

DO remember this: strippers are more fucked up than The Who was during their 1973 U.K. “Quadrophenia” Tour. They’re a bad lot to hang out with, because there’s so much freedom and money in Stripperville. They’ve got it all and they don’t need you or anyone else. All they need is their Xanax and Raspberry Stoli on the rocks and their job. Yeah — the job. That’s what fuels the lifestyle and you’re never going to pry her from it. Don’t even suggest it.

If your goal from the aforementioned list is “sex,” you need to understand that it’s going to take at least five dates. At least. Figure $250 per date. Compound that and it’s a nice little used Hobie Cat or a decent house payment. While that fine body, devoid of tan lines, might fuel you to the fifth date, I’d recommend looking into escort services in your area. With an escort, you’re getting what you want right off the bat, and it’ll likely cost you half of what Cinnamon is charging.

Good luck in Stripperville. It’ll be a short stay, but something you’ll talk about for years to come.

At the end of the day, my hours are flexible, i can take time off whenever I want and have my days free. I make more money than a lot of men that come into the club. Men assume women that work in this industry are whores, liars, drug addicts and damaged. How about re-examining your narrow-minded preconceived ideas about dancers. I am a classy girl who came from a good family, I have morals and values and am a good hearted person. There are tons of women that work in this industry, and judging dancers purely on their occupation is just plain ignorant. If a person has these awful qualities that this blog has put out there, it’s not the job… they were most likely those type of people before they started dancing. BTW, dancing has brought more positive things into my life than not, school:paid-for, Car:paid-for, I own my own apartment that probably should be photographed for ‘house beautiful’… As long as I surround myself with open-minded loyal people and i am a good person, who is anyone to belittle my job. I’m sure there are plenty of scum-bags that work in strip clubs but don’t judge a dancer by her outfit…

Think about it:

The tradition of the burqa/headscarf is the product of a patriarchal system that is geared towards and tailored to pleasing men by placing the responsibility of curbing male lust primarily upon women.

Similarly, the modern stripper is the product of a patriarchal system that is geared towards and tailored to pleasing men by catering to that lust.

Both are designed to sustain the dynamics of a male-dominated society.

Both presume and maintain the status of women as sexual objects — whether it’s by having them covered from head to toe, or exposed from head to toe — depending on whether the men in the immediate environment want to curtail their seemingly uncontrollable sexual urges or exercise them.

In effect, the burqa fosters the objectification of women just the same — but in reverse.

Both can be seen as insulting not only to women, but to men, perpetuating the stereotypical notion that men have virtually no self-control over their testicular physiology, and no discretionary sense.

That said, many women who choose to wear the burqa/headscarf or be exotic dancers do so out of choice, pleasure, and sometimes, for liberation. Whether we agree with their views or not, these choices, like anything else, are personal and individual, shaped by many complex circumstantial and environmental factors.

We have heard women who defend the burqa/headscarf say that women who choose to uncover themselves are treating themselves as commodities.

We have also heard women who oppose the burqa/headscarf say that women who cover themselves are oppressed.

President Obama defended the rights of women who choose to wear the headscarf in his speech in Cairo.

President Sarkozy, on the other hand, has declared unequivocally that burqas are not welcome in France.

Muslims have come out in large numbers in the past to protest bans on headscarves in France and Turkey.

However, there hasn’t been any organized protest from them against the mandatory imposition of headscarves in Iran and Saudi Arabia.

Headscarves, strippers, burqas, bans, mandation, objectification, oppression… where can we get some consistency?

Only from the same core values that have always been consistent when we’ve faced these kinds of complex social issues:

Equality and Choice.

I am not opposed to a woman’s choice to wear a burqa. Nor am I opposed to a woman (or man) choosing to be an exotic dancer. I am in opposition only to the idea of banning any individual from choosing the life they want to lead — whatever we may think of it.

How to meet strippers

Instructions.1.Step 1
Follow your intuition when you meet a woman who says she is a stripper. Get to know her without visiting her job. If she can keep her work separate from her personal life, you may have a chance at normal dating.

2.Step 2
Keep an open mind. If you meet a woman online and find out she is a stripper, you don’t have to write her off as a **** right away. Meet in person first.

3.Step 3
Prepare yourself for competition and rejection if you date a stripper and find yourself waiting in line for another date. Many men fantasize about dating a stripper, and some women take advantage of this fantasy to get extra perks from the men they go out with.

4.Step 4
Hang back and be cool when you visit the strip clubs. Tip well and remain respectful at all times. Strike up a casual relationship with the bartender or bouncer. You just might find that a stripper who works there will ask you out on a date.

5.Step 5
Accept what she does and don’t try to change her if you find yourself falling in love with a stripper that you are dating. Eventually she will come around and will want to give it all up for you. But trying to force strippers to do anything they don’t want to do is nearly impossible.

And yet, take a wild guess what I’m going to talk about today.

But before I do, allow me to be perfectly clear. The world is indeed saturated with the same warmed-over advice about how to “game” each other when out on the town. But Sunday night, a flat-out wild realization hit me like a bolt of lightning while Emily and I were out at…well…a bar.

There is one angle of this whole “bars & clubs” schtick that I’ve never heard talked about anywhere. Karaoke “game”.

So what caused this epiphany? Well, basically Emily and I have both known for quite sometime that karaoke joints tend to be naturally more social places than most bars. This is understandable. After all, you’re in an “interactive” setting where the audience is self-generating the entertainment. This makes fellow co-participants want to talk to each other…congratulating or even co-conspiring with each other.

Sunday night was no different…except for two key events. First of all, there was the decidedly average woman who booted herself at least two notches up any man’s raw attraction scale upon belting out the World’s Hottest Rendition of Carrie Underwood’s “Before He Cheats”. Shortly thereafter, something even more mind-bending happened. A few minutes after completing my first “selection”-a particularly soulful one that nobody could have predicted I’d go for-Emily had several decidedly hot young women tap her on the shoulder, gaze longingly into her eyes and say something to the effect of, “Oh…that was so dreamy. How come my boyfriend can’t be like YOURS?”

As if that wasn’t shocking enough, the looks and comments actually RAMPED UP as the night progressed. Emily’s “perfectly imperfect” take of “Hella Good” didn’t hurt. Neither did hearing every chick’s voice in the place singing along with my hard-practiced “Jumper” by Third Eye Blind.

So it hit me: Karaoke “game”-when strategized and executed correctly-has got to be the most naturally effective version of “night game” imaginable. Seriously. Get this right, and men and women BOTH can practically own the whole place, driving “interest-level” on the part of the opposite gender so rambunctiously in the process that people are practically throwing numbers and e-mail addresses.

Let’s break it down. First, here’s WHY:

1) It takes REAL CONFIDENCE to even get up there. Doing so provides HARD evidence.

2) You cause every hottie in the room to NOTICE YOU, even as you get this done without any shred of NEEDINESS whatsoever.

3) You get MAD SOCIAL PROOF without begging for approval (just for showing up, really…even if you’re verifiably terrible)

4) Everyone understands you have a REAL PERSONALITY and that you might actually be FUN to hang out with.

5) You get to make eye contact with whomever you want from up there-all while in a position of leadership over the whole room.

Wait a minute…all of those bullet points sound familiar. If my head is on straight, ALL OF THE ABOVE READ LIKE THE BASICS OF CREATING ATTRACTION. And all in one simple step? Are you KIDDING ME?

No. I am most certainly not kidding you. Remember, however, that I did complicate matters by mentioning that both STRATEGY and EXECUTION have to be on-point. Otherwise, it ain’t happenin’ for you.

So you know WHY, here’s HOW:

1) Get Up There

You have to participate in order to reap the benefits. And here’s the best part: You DO NOT have to know how to sing. Think about it. There are people you can name off the top of your head who have RECORD CONTRACTS and can’t carry a tune in a bucket. The strategy? Pick songs by those people! (Duh). Now, on the other hand, if you were the star of your high-school choir and/or you can sing along to the radio in the car like a freakin’ rock star…I don’t want to hear any more excuses. The world is yours on a silver platter here. Sack up.

2) Plan Your “Set” Ahead Of Time

It’s important to pick a few songs you think you could theoretically nail to the floor ahead of time. Then, get on iTunes and drop a lousy buck for each one. Then play them ten times in a row until they are STONE COLD. I know one guy who truly can’t sing, but has some Weird Al song down so ridiculously that he brings the house down with it every time. Practice…it’s worth it. Smoothness rocks even over raw talent in most cases.

3) Mix It Up

This is a major way to go from “participation” to “looks of awe and amazement accompanied by unsolicited approaches from everyone present”. Say you decide you feel comfortable with a particular hip-hop tune. Next time you get up there, throw down something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. Going from rock-station anthem to R & B classic works particularly well. Whatever the case, work hard to have at least one slower, libido-inspiring arrow in the proverbial quiver of tunes in your repertoire. If you are summarily freaked out by even getting up there for now, this can wait. But work towards it.

4) If You Already Have A Date, Sing To Him/Her

One time I busted out with “Sara Smile” to a woman named Sara, who I’m pretty sure still talks to her friends about it even though the guy who did it is now married-to someone else. What made the whole gig even more poignant is that there was NO CHANCE of guessing that a guy like me would pull that one out of the ether. Jaws dropped. Nice.

5) Bring Energy

You’ve heard that you need to bring high energy when “opening a set”. This is no exception. In fact, “energy” equals “awesome” a shockingly high percentage of the time.

6) Collaborate And Be Social

High five others when they are done. Ask the next table over what they are singing. Find someone to sing the male/female duet with you (nice). Are you beginning to see how this can be like “shooting fish in a barrel”? Just leave the guns home.

7) Dance To Other People’s Songs

Emily and I did this-when nobody else had-and what do you know…everyone else joined us. Not only do you show some leadership when you do this, you validate whoever is on stage. Make friends, influence people, create attraction.

By now, you may be thinking, “How come I never figured any of this out before?” If you are like most, it’s because you’ve long ago ruled out any chance of anyone dragging you on stage. Get over it, and watch amazing things happen.